Indulgence:
i found myself becoming almost a hermit recently, when i was zipping around town(oh yes, i have been back in sin for about a week now) on my own, wandering thru malls searching for kitchen wares and towels, hunting for a bluetooth device that enables me to talk in the car without inserting any stuffs to my ears(got it but failed to work after three days of usage! UGGH!) and at the same time averting stares from strangers who thought i am who i am, or question if i am who i am and also looks that spelled interest…hmmm… Somehow, one step followed the other and i eased myself through grounds that many has trodden upon and getting from pt a to pt b without any preambles or a nod of acknowledgement.. i did stuff that i set out to do and completed them..i worked feverishly on my new place and it turned out just the way i envisioned it to be( almost..i think..for i am forever bursting with new ideas and details to be added or taken away..fortunately this is the seventh month which means that i am not able to shift in thus i could have all this time to polish it up to meet all my requirements…)
i set out to pursue one long standing dream of mine, which was a good long fourteen years of dreaming, a dream that i have always pinned it down as a dream and at one point, this dream almost became a reality but went down the drain.The years that followed grieved me miserably and every glimpse or notion of that dream triggered a shot of pain thru my aching heart..i pursued it once more this time and the emancipiation of this dream is so intense that i almost became oblivious to the rest of the world, just like this dream has been the centre of my being for the fateful 14 years that has gone by. though the signs are promising and seems like this time round it might become a reality, i choose not to scream on top of me lungs till the fat lady sings! keeping my fingers crossed for the realisation of that wish, so crossed that probably everyone else around me would be crossed, for reasons that only i would know. Crossed or not, that’s their take,for it dawned on me (since sometime last month after tons of flying around and going places), that we really should not take time for granted and we should really not waste our time on things that doesn’t matter, people that doesn’t matter and spend time on things that matters..and in many cases, it usually meant ourselves. Yup, ourselves..Let’s look at it from another angle.
Say, how many times have we detour our courses for the sake of another,
changed our lifestyle for another,
changed our hairstyle for another,
changed our style of dressing for another? You got the picture? GOOD!
Maybe its time for us to live our lives more for ourselves( not just for ourselves but more for ourselves as i really don’t want to go and become a self centred a*… ya?)and perhaps while setting out to do this you might start to feel happier…
Yup.. that’s what i have been doing recently and you know what?
It felt really good..so good that i think i am even starting to eat right and packing on a few extra pounds but what the …hmm…it felt just ….right!
Hello everyone, my name is bryan and i have been indulging myself!
